The Sex Files with Emily Morse

5 Tips For a First Date

A couple on their first dateWe’ve all blurted out something inappropriate on a first date, whether you rehash the time you were stoned and ate your grandma’s Birthday cake, or admit you got dumped by your last three partners for being too needy. Of course, that is not to say you shouldn’t be yourself. Just follow these 5 Tips for a First Date and you should be okay! Unless you have an incredibly dull personality (just kidding, you’re great). 


1. Go somewhere casual and fun.

A fancy restaurant with violins playing in the background puts a lot of pressure on the date. Instead of picking the most trendy place in town, pick someplace laid-back where you can have a good conversation. Start off at a funky coffee shop or your favorite bar with appetizing snacks. The more relaxed the destination is, the more comfortable you will feel on the date.


2. Don’t say negative things about yourself or other people.

It makes you look insecure and pessimistic. It’s okay if you make a couple harmless self-deprecating jokes, but don’t go overboard. Instead, showcase the positive things happening in your life. If the conversation takes a dreary turn, say something like, “the past is the past, my bad experiences have shaped my life and I wouldn’t be who I am today without them.” Then direct the conversation to something you are passionate about.


3. People are more attractive when they talk about things they’re interested in

… as long as it’s not all they talk about. Remember, you don’t have to brag about your accomplishments to show them what you’re about. It’s good to talk about what you do at your job, but even if they seem interested in the launch campaign for the deodorant you’re selling, they’re probably not. Give them a slice of what your job is about and leave some mystery.


4. Don’t be glued to your cell phone.

I realize that pretending to check your cell phone is a great way to avoid awkward silences, but resist the urge. Stay engaged. Make eye contact with your date instead of with your phone, and ask them how many siblings they have or if they’ve seen Gravity yet.

You are not in a relationship so don’t act like you are.


5. Be present.

Don’t play out your future relationship with the person in your head. This is a first date. You are not in a relationship so don’t act like you are. This isn’t a good time to mention that you want to have their babies. On the other hand, don’t go into a date thinking that it’s doomed. Try to enjoy the company of another person and analyze later. Worst-case scenario, it’s an opportunity to tell all the funny stories your friends are sick of hearing.


Want more Sex With Emily? Check out my podcasts for free on iTunes, my book Hot Sex and my iPhone apps Kegel Camp and Sex Drive. Check out my new intimate care line Emily & Tony for massage candles that turn into luxurious massage oil and DownUnder comfort to stay fresh and dry down there. Use Coupon Code SEXWITHEMILY or 20% off.

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