Category Archives: The Relationship Couch

Why you should date the short guy

One of my male friends is 5'7". He's been on and told me his message inbox is radio silent. He will message women and they won't respond, and doesn't receive messages initiated by women either. But then he told me, "Anita, just for fun sometimes I change my height to 6 feet, and then my inbox gets flooded with messages." Several of my male clients are on dating app and mention that of the first questions that women ask them is their height. When they say they're 5'9" or 5'8", they don't hear from them again. The average height for men is 5'9"! Read more

7 Things You Should Look For in a Long-term Partner

If you’re like most of my clients, you probably have a “type” when you’re looking for love. But after working with couples for almost a decade, I’ve found that there are traits in you and a partner that will help make your relationship work for the long haul. Besides the typical respect and trust, here are 7 more: Read more

Why Men Won’t Commit

If there’s one thing that pains me to hear from my female clients, it’s that the guy they’re dating is scared of commitment. In the dating stage it may look like inconsistent contact, last minute get togethers or booty calls. In a relationship, it may mean waiting to hear “I love you,” not moving in together or not getting engaged. Read more

Break Up Tips – I Got Dumped. Now What?

Dear Anita, I was dating this guy for almost a year and he just dumped me. It took me by surprise and now I’m struggling. I think my friends are tired of hearing about him. It’s been three months since the breakup but I can’t get over it. Can you give me some tips to get over him please? - Julia in Chicago Read more

What can you do to take it back?

When I hang out with my friends Jacqui and Matthew, it’s always a good time. They're very passionate, opinionated and playful. Sometimes they may say something to the other that crosses the line. But what they usually do next is something I love to watch – they say, "Take it back." Not "Take it back jerk!" or "What the hell, take back what you said right now!" Just a "Take it back" with a smile on his or her face. The other one then can’t help but smile either and says, "Ok ok, I take it back." Sometimes they may even go a step further and share a quick kiss. Read more

Four Love Lessons from The Bachelor

Dating tips for women
I know, I know…some of you are rolling your eyes at the title of my blog. Seriously, what can The Bachelor teach us about love? When the first season aired in 2002, I too thought, What are these women thinking? Where’s their self-respect? But when I watched this season’s episodes, I had a different take on the show. It’s not because it’s any different now than 13 years ago, but because I’m different. In 2002 I was still in college. Now, I’m a dating and relationship coach who has spent the last several years specializing in love and researching what makes relationships work. It’s been my job to help my clients figure out why they act like they do when it comes to love. Are people truly crazy and irrational, or can behaviors actually make sense? In the context of love and our need to connect with a person, the bachelorettes’ behaviors seem pretty reasonable. Here are 4 lessons from The Bachelor that can be applied to your love life: Read more
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