Patti's Blog

The secret to better sex


I got into this business because I love love. Really, there’s no one who’s more smitten with romance than I am. But, that doesn’t mean that I don’t love sex too. Those two often go hand in hand! Or something else in something else, if you know what I mean. And I’m here to share with you the one secret that will make your sex life a million times better. Are you ready for it? Ok, here it is—Communication! That’s right. Not kegels or costumes or whipped cream. It’s good old fashioned communication that’s going to heat up your sex life. And here’s how to do it.


Talk during sex

It probably doesn’t come as a surprise to know that I talk a little in boudoir. And it’s not because I like the sound of my own voice. Or, at least, it’s not just because of that. It’s because I don’t usually sleep with mind readers. So, if I want my man to stop or start something, I have to tell him in the moment. And you should too. Believe me, he won’t think you’re being bossy. He’ll be grateful. And probably even turned on by it.


Talk after sex

Have a little post-mort on your love making. If your dude did something new that you absolutely loved, let him know that the creativity was appreciated so he’ll try it again. On the other hand, if something happened that didn’t float your boat, let him know about that too. Be gentle with your delivery. Open communication doesn’t mean brutal honesty. Trying something like, “You know when you did that new thing? What if you tried this instead? I love that we’re trying new stuff, schnuckums.” (“Schnuckums” is optional, but recommended!)

It’s good old fashioned communication that’s going to heat up your sex life.

Talk before sex

And I mean way before. Before the clothes come off. Before you get to the bedroom/kitchen table/bathroom floor (wherever you do it.) Before you’re even actually thinking about having sex. Talk to him about your shared sex life in general, how you can improve, what would make you happier and what would make him happier. Sometimes talking about sex outside of the bedroom can bring up things you’re a little too “busy” to think about in the bedroom.


Do you agree with me that communication is the secret to good sex? Let me know in the comments!