The Men's Room - Love and Relationship Advice From a Man For Women

Why Aren’t More Men Like Christian Grey?

Are you looking forward to the upcoming 50 Shades of Grey movie?

Millions of women around the world will be packing movie theatres when they release this, just so they can spend a couple of hours with their ultimate fantasy, Christian Grey. He’s not the nicest character ever created, but one who knows how to get women hot under the collar.

So what is it you women love about Mr. Grey, and more importantly, why aren’t real guys more like him?

The Grey character knows how to seduce women. He knows that for women seduction and sexual attraction has to begin in the mind. Before you can win a woman’s body and soul, you have to win her mind.

Isn’t it true as a woman you want to be seduced? Don’t you want a man to take you on a journey of seduction, instead of just jumping on and off you like some kind of trampoline? Don’t you want a man who passionately desires you, and isn’t afraid to tell you about it?

I’m telling you, women are starving nowadays. You want to be seduced, and many modern men don’t understand or care about it. The author of the “50 Shades” series E.L. James, has tapped into the sexual starved society women live in today and taken advantage of it.

Before you can win a woman’s body and soul, you have to win her mind.

So Grey is a seducer. What else drives women nuts about him?

Well, he’s confident, powerful, and dynamic. He owns his words and his actions. He doesn’t need telling what to do. Women love that kind of self-confidence in men, but men have become lazy and passive. So why aren’t more men like Christian Grey?

Why don’t they care about seducing women, and why are they so romantically passive?

For me, men have become selfish and passive for one reason…


From their early teenage years, guys train themselves to get off as quickly as possible. They slap on some porn and stroke themselves to orgasm before someone calls them downstairs for dinner! That, combined with the unrealistic depiction of sex in porn is partly responsible for the decline in men who understand seduction from a women’s standpoint.

I tell guys all the time in my coaching programs, stop watching porn and pick up a book like “50 Shades of Grey.” Not so they can strut around like an ass, but so they get an idea of what turns women on. I tell them to read romance novels. These things sell like hotcakes because they tell stories of romance and passion, and you women fantasize about that stuff.

But you can play your part in the rehabilitation of modern men too. Some are passive because they’re outright terrified of women. They have no idea what you want, and they don’t want to make a fool of themselves in the bedroom. If you’re dating a passive guy, tell him want you want. Tell him what turns you on. And tell him if he’s doing something that feels good. Some men want to seduce and please you, but don’t know how to ask what you want.

Take the lead, tell him what you want, and maybe between us we can create a few more Christian Greys in society!

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