Relationships

What I think about The Bachelor breakups

Ben, Courtney, Emily, Jef. They called it quits! To both breakups, I say big whoop. Don’t get me wrong. I’m a huge fan of both shows, and I totally fell for Jef. His eyes. His humor. His style. Swoon. Swoon. Swoon. But you have to be extreme to think that either of these couples had a definite chance. Here’s what you can learn from these TV couples.

Understand the meaning of marriage

Off broadcast, deciding to get married shouldn’t be another way of saying, “Let’s get to know each other better.” You should have already discussed religion, politics, finances and your personal non-negotiables. I know that these shows are edited, but I really don’t think these serious conversations hit the cutting room floor on the level they should, and that’s why these engagements end so quickly.

Love should be reciprocated

Ben and Emily were the only ones in the picture being constantly pursued. They were not allowed to say I love you back. They’re only pursued. In reality, that’s not how true love works. Sure, I believe that men are hunters and they like to seek out women, but that’s just at the beginning of a relationship. It should even out into a partnership far before you pop the marriage question. Eventually, despite who seeks who first, the playing field should become equal.

You can’t fall in love on camera

I know, I know. I have my own dating show. So, plain and simple, can you meet the person you’re going to fall in love with on TV? Of course. But I don’t think it’s as easy to actually fall in love on camera. You can provide grounds that bring people together; you can play the matchmaker. But I don’t think a whole relationship can unfold on camera and be authentic. People are different on camera, and once the cameras aren’t rolling, producers aren’t asking you the emotional questions and planning perfect dates. Suddenly, it’s about more than perfect lighting, and things are going to feel really different. Those things might not feel like love anymore. Is it impossible? No! Is it hard? Yes!

Were you shocked by these splits?

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