The kids are using the shorthand “LDR” now, but long distance relationships aren’t a new thing. I’ve had my share, regrettably, and so have many of my friends. Long distance relationships are hard and complicated and take a crap-ton of effort, but we all know that our hearts aren’t sensible organs. It would be so much easier if we all fell in love with our next-door neighbor, wouldn’t it? But, since we don’t live in a ‘90s TGIF sitcom, that’s not possible. Some of us have to make long distance relationships work. If that’s you, here are three New Year’s resolutions you need to make to help your relationship survive 2018.
Resolve to organize travel
Get your shit together in the travel department. I get why you’ve been putting this off. There’s absolutely nothing romantic about planning out every date you two will have for the next six months. But, sorry sister, when you’re in a long distance relationship, you don’t have the luxury of unplanned romance. I also want you to get your travel points and perks in line. Get a credit card that earns you points on the airline you fly or get a frequent flier number if you don’t already have one. Do some research and figure out what flight routes and dates are the least expensive and organize around those. Book early so you get the best rates. I feel like a weird career coach telling you this, but plan for success or plan to fail with your long distance relationship. Make sure you get to see your man and you don’t go broke doing it.
Resolve to sex it up
Men are animals. (Women are too. All humans are! But, not the point here.) Men have needs and instincts that they can’t ignore. And one of those needs is to get off regularly. If you two aren’t together a lot, you still need to make sure you’re meeting his sex needs…or he’ll get them met another way. Believe me, I’m not saying that cheating is allowed or not his fault or your fault if it happens, but I am saying that you should sex it up to satisfy him as much as possible so it’s less likely. Think of it like defensive driving. You’re less likely to get into an accident if you’re super cautious and alert. But, it’s not your fault if you get rear ended at a red light. Make sense? So, have as much sex as possible when you two are together. No going to bed early because you’re tired. Take advantage and get intimate with your man during the limited time you have. And then keep it going while you’re apart. I’m talking phone sex and FaceTime sex, for sure. Also, some sultry pictures won’t hurt. They don’t have to be nudes or even show that much skin to be sexy. Bare only as much as you’re comfy with. Sexy packages, maybe of lingerie you’ll wear the next time you see him or a sex toy you want to use together, are also great ideas.
Resolve to make an end game
Long distance relationships aren’t sustainable. There needs to be an end game with a set timeline that you both agree to. This likely is going to mean sacrifice on both your parts, but maybe not as much as you think. Get creative in your solutions. You don’t have to move to him and he doesn’t have to move to you. You both could move somewhere new. Or maybe your job would be cool with having you work remotely so you don’t need to give that up. Or his job might fly him between offices so he can split his time between you and where his current home base is. Like the travel planning, this conversation isn’t going to be that fun because it’s a lot of logistics and compromise, but it’s so needed. If you two can’t figure out an end game, then what’s the point of this relationship? Time to get out and find someone who you can build a life with…not just a frequent flier mile account.
If you want your long distance relationship lasts through 2018 and beyond, you have to get cracking on these three resolutions ASAP. Good luck!