The Men's Room - Love and Relationship Advice From a Man For Women

Why Has He Stopped Having Sex With You?

Frustrated woman wonders why did she stop having sex with meYour man has suddenly gone off sex. The alarm bells are ringing in your head. It’s time to panic! Or is it?

Do you want to know the REAL reason men “go off” sex?

I’ll tell you in a minute, but first let’s look at how women normally react to this situation. In my two decades of coaching women, I see two reactions from women. The first thing that happens is you’ll ask your friends what they think, and most the time they’ll ask if you think he’s cheating. Now you have a seed of doubt in your mind and you’re worried.  

Suddenly you turn into a detective, looking around your home for hidden love notes or anything else you can find. It’s like an episode of CSI. You’ll be looking for lipstick stains, restaurant receipts, or anything else you can use as evidence. You’ll try to look at the text messages or pictures on his phone to see if there’s anything incriminating you can find.

Next comes, the Facebook and Twitter investigation. Who are the new people he’s talking to all of a sudden. It’s almost as if you WANT To find something. You’re so convinced by the story in your head that he’s cheating, that you’ll do anything to validate it. At least that way you’ll know the truth. Even if you find something innocent, you’ll somehow tie it into your story, just so it all makes sense to you.

The other reaction I’ll see from women is they’ll go into silent mode. Instead of facing the issue, or talking it through with their man, they go silent.

So if your man isn’t having an affair, what’s the real reason he’s not having sex with you anymore?

Men are emotional beings too, and we need to feel connected to you to have sex. Maybe you’ve had a row and for whatever reason he’s still upset about it.

If your man isn’t having sex with you, chances are he’s not feeling emotionally connected to you. Yep, I said it. Men are emotional beings too, and we need to feel connected to you to have sex. Maybe you’ve had a row and for whatever reason he’s still upset about it. Maybe he feels neglected in some way. Maybe he feels like some of his needs aren’t being met, and he doesn’t know how to tell you.

It’s very rarely because he’s cheating on you. The last thing most men want is to bring another woman into their lives and complicate things any more. Also, think about it, if he’s having an affair wouldn’t he be trying to keep it secret rather than leaving you a huge beacon of a clue like not giving you sex?

Men don’t always think with our penis. Sure, a lot of the time we do, but not ALL time. You need to start thinking about the problem, rather than jumping to conclusions about things. Guys are emotional the same as you are. We’re just as afraid of being hurt as you are. We’re just as vulnerable as you are. So the next time you suspect your man is being unfaithful because he’s giving up on sex, maybe look a little deeper for the reason why.

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