The Men's Room - Love and Relationship Advice From a Man For Women

5 Reasons Why Women Shouldn’t Be Afraid to Ask For Sex

Asking for SexLadies, it constantly astounds me how many of you don’t think you’re attractive enough or confident enough to ask a guy for sex. The way some of you go about it you think you have to be Gisele Bundchen to have the courage tell a guy you want to sleep with him.

I’m here to shatter this pre-conceived notion.

1. Men Love Being Asked for Sex

If you tell a man you want no strings attached sex he’s going to think you’re a waking dream. All their lives men have watched movies and played games showing them ultra attractive women begging alpha men to have sex. They’ve seen it in James Bond, Batman, Derek Jeter, so on and so forth. Guys dream about turning into these men one day.

When you tell a guy all you want from him is sex, he’s come a little bit closer to becoming his hero.

2. You’ll Feel Better

Having no strings attached sex is one of the most liberating things a woman can do for herself. Being with someone you probably won’t see tomorrow allows you a freedom you don’t get in romantic sex. Not that there’s anything wrong with romantic sex.

But sex based purely on lust can be pretty fantastic too.

3. It Will Boost Your Confidence

One of my female clients told me about the first time she wore high heels. She said it was a bit painful, but she was able to momentarily forget about it when she saw herself in the mirror…

Her legs were longer and leaner. The dress she had on before fit her fine, now it clung to her hips. She felt sexy and empowered.

All of this empowerment came from just a pair of shoes.

Asking for what you want and getting it is a huge confidence boost.

Aren’t you frustrated at constantly waiting for the guy to ask you?

Then don’t wait.

Ask him!

Take charge of your own sex life.

4. You Can Take Charge Without Taking Over

Men still want to feel like men. They’re turned on when they’re desired but, go too far to the other side and start demanding things, it’s a turn off.

The differences are subtle. Taking charge is walking up to a guy at the bar, touching his arm, and asking what his plans for the night are. This gives him room to make the play, but leaves no doubt about your intentions.

Taking over is walking up to a guy and saying, “Wanna fuck?”

They’ll never admit it, but guys like to be romanced. They like to know a woman is interested in them, but they still want to be perceived as the man in the relationship. Leave enough room for him to take the lead when he’s ready. You’re just extending an invitation.

5. The “Yes” Will Come

A lot of times I see clients attempting new things, but they’re attitude is one of failure.

They’ll say, “I’ll try it but it won’t work.” I can see it in their posture; shoulder slumped, eyes glued to the ground, constantly huffing and puffing.

And I’ll tell you something, the people you’re talking to can see it, too. Have you ever been hit on by a guy with low self-esteem?

He’s bumbling.

He’s shaking.

He can’t look at you…

It’s not flattering it’s weird and uncomfortable. You think, “Why is he so afraid? I’m just a person.”

And sure, you might be flattered that someone thinks you’re so attractive they can barely speak, but you’re also not going to sleep with this person.

It’s the same with guys. They’re not as good at reading people as women are, but they’ll notice self-esteem issues a mile away.

A defeatist attitude isn’t going to get you very far. So, throw back those shoulders, put on your best smile, and be honest. If he says no tell him it’s his loss and move on to the next guy you find interesting.

You won’t have to wait long.

Guys are horny 24 hours day, 365 day a year. If you want sex, you can have sex. You only have to ask and you shall receive.

Photo credit: Alba Soler Photography / CC BY-NC-ND