How to Deal with a Cancelled Date

14591726690_6f2125ea08You have a date planned. For some women, that means prep starts up to a week before with waxing and peels. For others, it could mean just a restless night of sleep due to first date nerves. Some women might get up early and blow out their hair before work so they can be date ready right at 5pm. Other women might spend their lunch Google stalking their set up. No matter who you are, if you have a date, there’s some sort of pre-date ritual you go through. And it’s a real buzzkill when you’re all amped up for a date and the guy gets in touch to cancel. Here’s how to deal.

Treat yourself

You just got the word that your awesome date that you’re all revved up for isn’t happening tonight. BOO! But, girl, that doesn’t mean that you have to stay in and mope about it. Put on that same sexy outfit you were planning on wearing and go out somewhere fabulous. Maybe one of your girlfriends will go with you or there’s a work happy hour you can join last minute. If not, go to a bar by yourself. You might not be meeting the man you were planning on meeting tonight, but that doesn’t mean you can’t meet another very special man. Don’t let yourself get upset. Have fun and don’t think about the cancellation.

Decide if it’s legit

Ok, now that you’ve had an awesome night and are in a good place mentally, it’s time to decide if this cancelling dude is worth your attention. My big thing with cancelled dates is factoring in respect. Was how he cancelled respectful? Did he cancel last minute (like an a-hole) or give you a heads up (which would be respectful)? Or is his reason legit? Is he sick? Did work stuff pop up out of the blue? Did he even give you a reason? You need to make sure you believe his reason for cancelling and you feel respected by how he handled the situation. If you don’t on either account, ditch the loser. Make that cancelled first date the only date you ever plan with him.


If you believe him and feel fine about how the situation was handled, then go for the reschedule. But, it’s up to him to actually suggest the reschedule. He’s the one who cancelled the plans to begin with. He needs to make up for it by picking a new time and a really fun date for the two of you. You can follow up post cancellation once about the situation that cancelled the date, but that’s all. For example, “Hope you’re feeling better.” Or “How did that presentation go?” And then let him take the lead.

Make another date

Don’t put all of your dating eggs in this cancelling dude’s basket. Get online and find another fine gentleman to date. Spreading out your dating attention will make it less emotional when someone cancels. And with online dating, someone always will! It’s just how it works. Online dating is great in a lot of ways, but it’s definitely a flake-fest. Spread out your first dates and you’ll be in a better mental state to deal with the cancellations.

Good luck, single ladies! It’s a jungle out there, but I know you’ll find the perfect guy!

Photo credit: Thomas8047