I am forever beating the drum about how our dreams help us to improve every area of our lives, especially the relationship area. Below is a recent example of this. A single mom had been struggling with a relationship for quite some time; she was unsure if she should continue to give it effort or not… and then she had this dream:
I dreamed I was walking and bare foot. Then a clear white spider jumped on me and bit the bottom of my foot. I tried to peel it off of me only to have it jump and bite my hand. I had to peel it off my right pointer finger like Velcro. – Jessica 35, Aurora, CO
Lauri: Has something or someone been bugging you lately? Spiders can also symbolize deceit, someone who spins a web of lies. Since the spider was clear, I’m wondering if you are feeling bit by something that should have been clear to you. It seems you need to “put your foot down” once and for all. Since your index finger is a focus in this dream, it may have to do with discipline or blame as that is what we use that finger for: to nag, to tell people what to do as well as to point something out. It’s your right finger so you must feel you are in the right. Has there been lying going on around you? And if so, did this happen twice since the spider bit you twice (your hand and then your foot)? The Velcro quality of the spider makes me think someone is clinging to you… or the after effects are. I believe your dream is telling you that you should have “put your foot down” about this a while ago.
Jessica replies: The guy I’m seeing says one thing, then completely contradicts himself. You are right that I should have known better, but I have been trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. We have known each other for almost a decade and had a physical relationship in the beginning, parted ways then caught back up. Now he says he’s “always had feelings” etc. but every time he said “I would like to see you,” I offer an idea and he flakes out. He also says he would do anything for me but when I make a joke he says “I’m done”. At this point I’m done. Yet he continues to “confess” his love. I blame myself because this should have been “clear” to me sooner. Thank you!
Jessica’s dream is showing her that her boyfriend is behaving like the spider in the dream, his behavior keeps biting her and will likely continue to do so unless she “exterminates” what has become a pesky situation in her life.
This is how your dreams are working for you too. They will show you your current situation, and your relationship, in the form of a story in order to give you a different perspective so you can better understand your situation and make a better decision on it. Now that Jessica can see her boyfriend as a pesky little spider with a chronic biting problem, she knows he is not for her and adds nothing but pain to her life.
What about you? Are you having relationship trouble? If so, I guarantee you that your dreams are trying to help you sort it out. Post one of your dreams below and I’ll decode it for you!