The Men's Room - Love and Relationship Advice From a Man For Women

The Crazy World Of Dating On Tinder

dating on tinderA friend of mine sent me this great statement the other day:

“If you lack integrity, you’re dating on Tinder.”

For those of you who are stuck in a bubble or you’re an alien and you don’t know what Tinder is, let me explain. Tinder’s a dating app; an app that allows you to look at pictures and read profiles. There’s almost zero integrity on Tinder; everybody’s got an angle that they’re working.

A lot of people will say no and a lot of people are very critical.

I’m reading the profile of a woman right now that says, “Know the difference between sensual and sleazy, self-aware and self-centered, confident and cocky.” So immediately, I’m thinking to myself, oh she’s been burned so many times before.

But then again, welcome to a modern day where people just blow one another off and don’t really care about anybody else’s feelings or emotions. Everybody’s pretending to be something that they’re not. That’s why Tinder is so wonderful.

You can be any age you want because there’s no age check. Some of those people are always five to six years younger. People are very judgmental. We’ll look at a picture and decide whether or not we want to do that person.

This woman also goes on to say no to cigarettes, 4/20, weird shit, Prius driver, old-school, a few curse words in between. She’s just listing a bunch of things about what you shouldn’t be. Because that’s what dating is now. Dating app users feel the need to put up all kinds of things based on what they don’t want.

People are getting so frustrated with the lack of integrity in online dating sites. And to me, it’s kind of sad. What happened to believing in people? What happened to understanding one another? What happened to really relating to each other? People don’t want to do that anymore.

There’s so much anger because of the lack of integrity. Look at what these two profiles say:

1. “I hear quite a lot that I don’t look my age. Well, I’m really 30, two lovely sons, and 5’7”. So please be taller by at least four inches.”

2. “If you aren’t willing to send a message when we’re matched or have a conversation, don’t swipe right immediately.”

I don’t want to collect Tinders. Swiping is starting to hurt my thumb and I’d really much rather be meeting people organically. But then again, why aren’t you? Why aren’t you going out and meeting people organically? Why aren’t you going out and smiling and using that smile so that you can flirt and meet people?
Everybody is so sick of Tinder and dating and everything else but we aren’t doing anything about it. We’ve become lazy. Even though we hate the lack of integrity on Tinder and other dating apps, we still use them. We’ve become so lazy. We don’t want to do anything different.

Here’s a novel idea: instead of getting frustrated and angry, start meeting people again, start smiling, start saying yes.

Flirt on Facebook. Wow, think about that.

You know more about people on Facebook than you do on Tinder, yet you don’t seem to look through your friends list. You’d rather go and swipe than flirt with somebody on Facebook who you can actually look at and see their friends and see if there are mutual interests and connections.

What a novel idea. I think I’m going to write a whole post about that real soon.