How to change your bad dating attitude

dating attitudeAttitude is everything when it comes to, well, everything! Your perspective on your life is your life. If you think everything’s dandy, then everything actually is dandy. If you take a look at your life and all you can see is that poop swirl emoji, then your life is one big giant swirl of poop. With this in mind, I’ve been doing some secret sleuthing with my single girlfriends during our hangouts. I’ve been watching to see if my friends who are positive about dating have better dates and if the ones who are negative about dates have worse dates. My conclusions weren’t surprising, at least not to me. The ones with bad attitudes had many more bad dates than my friends with good attitudes. So, I think it’s really true that a good attitude brings in more positive dating experiences. If you have a bad dating attitude, that means it’s time to change it. Here’s how.

Celebrate small wins

Look, dating is tough. It’s not all rainbows and sunshine and I’m not going to make you fake that it is. But, there are really good parts of dating and those need to be celebrated to change your attitude. So, focus on the good stuff. Hey, you got a free drink! Concentrate on that rather than the following three hours when you had to hear about the guy’s recent ex-girlfriend who left him for someone named Jacques. Or pat yourself on the back for getting a match with a super cute guy and ignore the pervert who keeps sending you sexual SpongeBob GIFs. Give dating credit where credit’s due and try to ignore the parts where it’s not.

Positive self talk

You have to be the best version of yourself to see the good side of dating. So, be nice to yourself. When I’m feeling really down and hearing a negative voice in my head on repeat, I like to override it with positive self talk. And I literally mean talk. Like, talk to yourself out loud. Say nice things about how you look, who you are, how you treat people and just how lucky a guy would be to date you. Do this every morning for a week and guaranteed you’ll feel better about yourself and everything else in your life, including dating.

Gratitude dating journal

I’m a big believer in a daily gratitude journal. I know it sounds painfully lame. But, I get a lot out of writing down the things I’m grateful for every night before I go to bed. And if I’m in a particularly bad place about something specific, like career, health, or, yes, dating, I make it a point to spend a week focusing my gratitude journal on that one element of my life. So, if you’re down on dating, take two minutes before bed every day to write down one thing about dating that you’re grateful for. Maybe it’s something like learning new things or even taking comfort in the fact you’re not doing as badly as the guy who cried into her merlot on your last date. Finding things to be grateful for will help you turn your dating frown upside down.

Alright, now that you’re on the path to a better dating ‘tude, go forth and date! Good luck and keep those spirits up!