I’m so sick of women writing off good men for dumb things. No man is perfect. And neither is any woman, including you! That’s why I like to push the idea of limiting yourself to five non-negotiables and then being open to literally everything and anything else. But, so many women I encounter have lists miles long for the men they date and that’s not realistic or helpful to your love life or happiness. If you kick good guys to the curb for really silly stuff, it’s your loss. So, here are seven of the most common “deal breakers” I hear that should actually never break the deal.
Bad grammar
I’m a grammar snob, too. So, I get it. But, there are very smart and accomplished people who aren’t great at grammar. There are even great writers who aren’t stellar at grammar. That’s why copyeditors exist. Using “your” incorrectly isn’t a reason you can’t have a future with someone. You could teach him when to use “your” and “you’re” and then live happily ever after.
Past relationships
Past relationships are in the past. You can’t judge him based on his past because you don’t know the full story. He could have been very different back then or the person he was in a relationship with could have brought out the worst in him. So, stick to what he’s doing with you now and you’ll make much better decisions on the guy.
Dorky dressing
A lot of guys don’t have style and that’s unfortunate, but not an end all. You can buy him new jeans and “lose” his aqua socks somehow and then voila! You’ve got yourself a well-dressed man. Clothes are so superficial. Try to see through them! I mean, not like see through them to his naked body. Whatever. You get what I mean!
Height
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, any guy looks six feet tall when he’s standing on a stack of money! And even if he’s not wealthy, height is a silly thing to focus on. He has no control over it. If he’s comfortable being short, even if it’s shorter than you, then you should be comfortable being next to him.
Balding
Look, just about every guy is going to bald. So, at least you’re getting a preview of what he’s going to look like in a few years. Writing off balding guys is like writing off wrinkling guys. It’s eventually going to take your dating pool down to zero. You’re only hurting yourself.
First date blahs
You can’t tell a lot by a first date. If you went on a first date and didn’t hate him, I say don’t write him off and try for another date with him. A blah first date is actually an OK start and not a deal breaker at all in my book. It’s tough to feel anything but “ick” on a first date. So, if you’re feeling better than “ick,” I think you could be on the right path!
Bad family relationships
I know the old wisdom is how a man treats his mother is how he’ll treat you. I don’t necessarily believe that all the time. Some people have bad families that are tough to deal with and even the best guys have to set boundaries with their toxic parents or siblings. You really can’t judge a man for not being close with his family until you know the whole story.
Flip those lame dealbreakers into dealmakers and you could find yourself in a very happy, healthy relationship!
