How to tell if your new guy is getting you a holiday gift

holiday giftCongrats! You recently started dating someone who seems pretty great. That’s a truly wonderful thing. The pre-holiday timing could be a stressor, though. I know it would be for me. When the holidays hit in the first few weeks or months of a relationship, it can be tough to figure out how exactly to handle the gift giving aspect of those events. You two probably haven’t even had the exclusivity talk yet, so are you at a gift giving level? Would a gift from you scare him off? Would not getting him a gift make him feel unappreciated? Here’s how to tell if he’s planning on buying you a gift so you know if you should get him one.

He’s planning

Even in a world where Amazon Prime exists, gifting takes a lot of time. After all, there’s the brainstorming, hunting, finding, buying and giving. If your man asks questions about your travel plans, your likes and dislikes and when you can hang before the holidays hit, he’s likely on the gift hunt for you. If he’s being really casual and not making sure you two have special gift exchanging time before the holidays, then he’s probably not getting you anything. Try to feel him out and see if he’s feeling you out.

You’re his holiday boo

The holidays bring a lot of opportunities for your guy to show you how serious he is about you. Holiday parties being the big one. If your guys has a lot of holiday parties and you’re his plus one to all of them, you’re in and on the path to a gift exchange. If he goes to the parties stag, then it seems like he doesn’t think your relationship is solid enough for gifting. Also, if you invite him to holiday parties, gauge his response to the opportunity of being introduced to your friends and co-workers. It will tell you a lot about your relationship and, by proxy, your gift requirements.

He’s a giver

Even guys who are very into you could be deficient in the gift giving department. Some men just aren’t good at showing their feelings like that. And some women aren’t either! Listen to stories he tells about previous holidays or if he’s talking about finding presents for his friends and family. If he doesn’t mention giving gifts at all, then he’s probably not a gifter guy. We all have different love languages and it seems like his isn’t gifting. So, not getting a gift from him isn’t a reflection on your relationship, more an indication of how he does (or, actually doesn’t) show affection.

You ask him

I’m such a proponent of open communication, even when it’s awkward. And you know, especially when it’s awkward. That’s when communication is most key. I think it’s totally cool to straight up ask your man what he thinks about a gift exchange between the two of you. It’s the only way you’re really going to know where he is on the topic. Be prepared for any outcome and you also might want to prepare some parameters for gifting, if that feels right to you. Maybe you two will agree on a price range. Or maybe you’ll decide that you won’t do gifts and instead cook each other a meal. Whatever the case, you’ll be glad that you talked about it and got on the same page.

Hope this helps with your holiday hunting for your honey! And as soon as you get past this holiday hurdle, there’s Valentine’s Day holiday stress waiting for you. It just doesn’t stop, huh?