I am a firm believer that if a guy really wants a girl, he chases her; he wears his feelings on his sleeve and courts her with compliments and sweet nothings until she’s his! Now in the eyes of most girls, that’s an ideal man! But this isn’t really the case these days, especially when I go out and I look around me, I see a lot of ‘soft’ passive-aggressive guys playing hard to get, not approaching girls, but rather, waiting to be approached. Could this generation of guys possibly consist of a majority of softies and game-playing lazy boys? Could be. Let’s analyze it!
In my opinion, I don’t know if it’s my southern roots or what, but men should do the work to ‘win her over’ or at least approach the girl first and get her number (and girls this goes for you too, you should always be girls and sit back, smile and let him come to you). Instead I see the polar opposite happening, a sort of role-reversal between arrogant passive-aggressive guys and overly aggressive females. What is going on here? My theory is just this: either guys have gotten lazy on their own by some magical force, or us girls are making it too easy for them – that over time, they have gotten used to not courting because they aren’t demanded to court us anymore, thus creating a type of guy who is arrogant and lazy in the dating scene.
When I go out into the party scene or even during the day at a casual lunch I see guys literally sit there with their boys assessing which girls are hot, but not acting upon any of it- they don’t openly approach the hottest girl in the room anymore, instead they just wait for easier girls to come over (the types of girls who are aggressive in nature and these boys know they have a higher chance of not being rejected).
And girls, I see, much too often, you aggressively approaching the guy first, thus not giving a guy the chance to win you over. I see this on the regular and I understand why guys are being soft and playing hard to get- and with this soft and game-playing attitude, I also see why girls are being overly aggressive and approaching the guys first because even the prettiest of girls has gotten used to guys not trying to win her affection anymore, so she asserts herself. This seems to be a never-ending cycle – I get it, but who started this? Was it the lazy guy or the aggressive female? Who is to blame for such odd role-reversal?
Either way, this role reversal feels unnatural and really freaks me out! No matter who is to blame for this weird cycle, there is hope!
Girls, you can put an end to this lazy boy attitude and game-playing bullshit: all you need to do is sit back, relax, smile and demand him to work for you- by teaching him how to come to you, you are in turn, teaching him how you expect to be treated and guess what, that’s hot! What you’re doing here is separating the boys from the men. We all know well and good that a main foundational truth in life is that people, even the nicest of them, will treat you how you let them treat you.
So girls, it’s time to step up our game and demand to be treated like princesses, rather than letting him treat you however he thinks is right. But here’s the catch: in order to be treated like a prize to be won you must act like a prize to be won; I think all females should remain like calm and classy princesses – not an aggressive girl who is out looking for compliments.
It’s really up to you, the girl, to set the standards in a romantic relationship and this begins on the first time meeting someone you are solidifying and laying down the boundaries of how you want to be treated. So if you’re out hunting for guys you’re literally telling them through your body language that you don’t need to be courted, thus, they don’t court you and thus they get lazy and begin to shift their expectations that all girls will come to them.
So how does a girl demand to be courted? I am a firm believer that a little eye contact, a smile and positive body language go a long way, it is a great method for a girl to get a guys attention without aggressively asserting herself which has a ripple effect on the guy, making it too easy for him that he ends up not needing to court the girl, she’s literally done all the work for him- why would he need to try now?
The sooner you understand your own power the sooner you can teach these lazy boys how to man up and court you!
Girl believe it or not, you hold all the power (and first impressions last a life time) so the sooner you understand your own power the sooner you can teach these lazy boys how to man up and court you! As a girl, when I say power I mean you make the first cue, a glance is a cue to invite the guy and give him the confidence he needs to approach you and try to win you! And guess what, guys love a challenge- they naturally love to hunt and compete for a girls affection, so why again are you making it so easy for them?
In my opinion, the best things in life are earned with hard work and you as the girl, are the princess to be won! If he’s not actively trying to pursue you, and instead he is playing little boy games – expecting you to approach him first because he’s just too hot for his own good – you should sit back, relax and the right men will step forward and the little boys will remain in their safety blanket with all the easy girls.
Remember, people will treat you how you allow them, so girls, let’s wise up and teach these boys how to work for our affection and court us again, because every girl wants to be courted and every guy wants a challenge and not an easy girl. Clearly society has gone off on an unhealthy tangent and this strange dating role-reversal needs to get back to its natural state otherwise we will have an entire generation and new norm of overly aggressive females and passive-aggressive males.