The Sex Files with Emily Morse

The Lost Art Of Teasing: Turn it up for Great Sex


Teasing always gets a bad rap when it comes to dating, but when it comes to sex, it’s the best thing, since well sex.

Teasing is the best way to start up something steamy and the longer you savor the suspense, the better.

You know those delicious moments leading up to sex? Imagine if you could prolong all that sexual tension, the sizzling sense of anticipation and draw it out until you just can’t take it anymore. You have to have each other right then, right there, right now

This is why I’m teaching you the art of teasing.

Whoever came up with the phrase “The best things come to those who wait” was probably a big fan of the tease. After all, that’s the beauty of teasing.  Amplify the build up and you ensure a much greater climax.

Another reason for teasing: It helps couples to slow down, and really enjoy the journey, instead of just focusing on the destination.

Teasing Tips:


 1. Start It Off

    • Teasing starts long before you hit the bedroom! It can take place while you’re out to dinner, enjoying a movie, or in the car on the way home. Pretty much anywhere the mood starts to strike you!
    • Start  off with a little eye contact to communicate your sexy thoughts. Use light touches and caresses to send subtle messages before you seductively whisper in their ear, letting them know what the rest of the night has in store for them. Words are powerful tools of temptation, and spoken sexual desires are 100% legal to unleash in public, until you can make it home to act them out!

 2. Take It Off.. But Leave Some On

    • When we know we’re about to have sex, we have the tendency to tear off our clothes like basketball players who have just been called into the game. And once you’re completely naked, there’s really only one thing left to do…
    • Humans are visual creatures.  We love a good show! Instead of undressing at the speed of light, try slowing things down and undressing each other one piece at a time. Take the time to appreciate how your partner looks, partially clothed and enjoy the feeling of the fabric against your skin as you touch each other.

 3. Lip Tease

    • Kissing is one of those very erotic pre-sex activities that often gets shuffled aside in the race to orgasm, but there is nothing like a good old-fashioned makeout session to turn up the heat. Play around and mix up those kissing techniques; alternate between soft, light kisses and long, deep kisses with lots of tongue.
    • You can also use your tongue to to bring heat to other parts of your partner’s body as well. Start off with some playful licks around the ears and neck, then let your tongue trail down to other erogenous zones.  And don’t be afraid to use your teeth once and a while. Try a light nibble first to see how your partner responds, then build up to harder pressure.

 4. The Power of Touch

    • The sexiest tease sessions are the ones that draw on all the senses. When you remove one sense, you heighten all the others, which is why experimenting with a blindfold, like the Intima Silk Blindfold, can really take teasing to the next level. The less your partner can see, the more they can feel, which will make every touch all the more pleasurable and send their nerve endings into overdrive.
    • You can also try experimenting with some light bondage.Tie your partners hands behind their back, or to the headboard, using satin ties like BOA Pleasure Ties.  Use your lips, tongue, hands or any other props to tease them until they can’t take it anymore. Then it’s your turn!

 5. Switch Up the Sensations

    • Part of the fun of teasing comes from being able to titillate your partner, so why not mix things up? While you have them blindfolded, tied up or just laid out for your teasing pleasure, take the opportunity to treat them to a variety of sensations. Start off using your hands with light caresses, or a sensual massage, then bring other accessories into play.
    • Try using a silk scarf or a feather against your partner’s bare skin. Sweep them around the base of your partner’s penis, or trail them all over their body. This new sensation will be sure to tickle and tease them, and allows your to explore your partner’s contours and erogenous areas.


The secret to succeeding at teasing is being able to hold back and prolong the pre-sex seduction for as long as possible. I know you’re hot for each other and were ready to rip your partner’s clothes at the restaurant! But the point of teasing is to surrender to the build up – The best teases last until you feel like you can’t control your desire a single second longer. Now go out there and get teasing.

I love hearing from you! Please send all your questions

Want more Sex With Emily? Check out my podcasts for free on iTunes, my bookHot Sex and my iPhone apps Kegel Camp and Sex Drive. Check out my new intimate care line Emily & Tony for massage candles that turn into luxurious massage oil andDownUnder comfort to stay fresh and dry down there. Use Coupon Code SEXWITHEMILY or 20% off. Also, use coupon code EMILY for 15% off at Good Vibrations. These are my favorite sex toys and vibrators from Good Vibes: Sex Toy Recommendations (some restrictions apply). Never tried the #1 Male sex toy. Get a Fleshlight.