Relationships

What to do if he doesn’t appreciate you enough

gratitudeIt’s all about having an attitude of gratitude. Seriously, that’s the big secret to a happy and fulfilling life. All you need to do is be grateful for what you have and you’ll be living a wonderful life. Of course, that’s easier said than done. And it really gets tough if you feel like your man isn’t viewing your relationship with an attitude of gratitude. So many women I talk to complain about this. They don’t feel appreciated by their man and it bums them out. I don’t blame them. I feel so crummy when I’m in a relationship like that. So, I noodled up some pointers to help you get through this craptastic feeling and hopefully move to a place where you feel valued in your relationship.

Talk about it

Even if you’ve been with your man for decades, he can’t read your mind. My guess is that he has no idea that you’re feeling unappreciated. So, I suggest you straight up tell him. Find a quiet moment and explain to him how you’re feeling with examples of what he’s done to make you feel this way and what you wish he would have done differently. Also, give him ideas for what he can do in the future to make you feel better. Don’t be accusatory. You have to assume that he’s coming from a place of love (and ignorance). He loves you and didn’t know about your feelings. Once you get all of that off your chest, wait and be patient. Hopefully, he’ll start making changes that will make you feel like the amazing wife or girlfriend that I know you are.

Practice it

Gratitude is a two way street, sister. Once you ask for him to kick it up in the appreciation department, you should probably do the same. Make sure he knows how much you value him and the life you have together. You might even want to do something special for him. It can be really small, like picking up his favorite candy at the grocery store and delivering it to him with a cute note. Lead by example and that should make it much easier for him to follow.

Find it

Here’s the truth…you can’t control everything and how much this guy values you is one of the many things out of your realm of control. So, it’s up to you to find validation yourself. That might mean finding a new man. Sorry to say it, but that’s just the way the cookie crumbles sometimes! You get to decide who’s important enough in your life to make you feel valued. So, choose wisely. And if you make a mistake, don’t be afraid to correct it.

Hope that helps you all in the gratitude department! Remember, you should feel special around your special someone…because you are special!

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