The Sex Files with Emily Morse

5 Ways to Kink it up

Kinky fetish sexSex can become tedious if you repeat the same thing over and over again. Here are five ideas to add some kink to your sex life that will get you spanking, talking dirty, teasing, biting, and vibrating in no time.

1. Good Vibrations:

Masturbate in front of your lover using a vibrator, or let them take control of the toy and pleasure you. Using a vibrator during sex can also help bring you closer to orgasm. Choose a position like doggie style ormissionary position with your legs over his shoulders. Position the vibrator on your clitoris and hold it while he thrusts inside of you.

2. You’ve been a bad girl

When done correctly, a little spanking can deliver a lot of pleasure. Your hand is more powerful than you think, so start slowly, softly and alternate between cheeks. Double check with your partner to make sure the excitement is mutual or if a change in pressure is necessary. Spank the most padded part of the butt and thighs. It’s important to play with sensations while moving from a hard to a softer touch, while still making sure the hands don’t get out of hand. This is about pleasure and not inflicting serious pain.

3. What are you wearing?

Talking dirty can he the ultimate turn on but it might feel uncomfortable at first. First,  get into the role and find your dirty talk voice. It might be your normal voice or it could be more breathy and a bit lower. This is where swearing is allowed and even encouraged. Stay away from PC words like “penis” and start getting creative.  Remember, you can take your time. Start by just talking out loud about what’s happening and what you like. Try something like, “I really love the way you kiss my neck.” or “Your body feels so amazing next to mine.” Keep going and let your voice connect to your imagination and you’ll be amazed at what a pro you’ll become in no time.

4. BDSM for beginners

Call on your inner dominatrix and tie him to the bedposts using a tie, belt, or handcuffs. One of my favorites is bondage tape, it’s easy to use, reusable and versatile. While you explore your inner dominant side, he gets to explore his inner submissive for a role reversal. Try biting, talking dirty, spanking, and teasing to engage in a steamy power play. He will enjoy you being the boss, especially if you’re wearing a BDSM get-up.

5. Porn with a twist

If you think porn isn’t your thing, or only your guys thing, don’t knock it until you try it…together.

Choose a female-friendly film — that means one with an enticing title, an actual plot (no matter how ridiculous) or simply choose a flick with actors that you find attractive.

Watching porn together will not only turn you on, you can also use it as a tool to find out what you both find hot. Maybe you’ll be inspired to try a new move or a scenario that gets your particularly hot and bothered.

Try to make it through the entire film until you’re both about to burst before you give in to your urges. Extra points if you recreate what you just watched.


Email me your questions and stories to Want more Sex With Emily? Check out mypodcasts for free on iTunes, my book Hot Sex and my iPhone apps Kegel Camp and Sex Drive. Use coupon code EMILY for 15% off at Good Vibrations. Use coupon code EMILY25 for 25% off at, and coupon code EMILY for 20% off myAromatherapy Massage Candle and Down Under Comfort at