Most men are gross. That’s a fact. (Sorry, dudes. But you are. This will go a lot easier if you just admit it.) We’ve all dated guys who don’t ever wash their showers or don’t keep soap by the sink in the bathroom or only change their sheets when their mother comes to visit. And it’s kind of endearing at first in a quirky way. But, when that guy stops being your boyfriend and starts being your husband and now you’re living with a guy who doesn’t clean, it’s a whole lot less endearing. It goes from quirky to vomit-astic. Here’s how to deal with it.
Talk to him about it
If you’ve ever read a post on my site, you probably saw this tip coming from a mile away. Instead of bottling it up inside that his boxers on the floor or beard shavings in the sink are driving you crazy, let him know! The important thing here is to not come off like you’re nagging. Instead of saying small things every once in a while to him, schedule a conversation with him and clearly outline what’s going on. Identify the behavior that’s bugging you, how exactly it makes you feel and what you want to change. Be calm during their conversation and don’t get emotional or whiney. Also, be prepared for his initial response to be less than ideal. Few people have the right reaction to any sort of conversation in the moment. Let it sit for a day or two and see if his behavior changes. My bet is that it will.
Work out a plan
Your slob of a husband isn’t going to become a neat freak overnight, no matter how much he loves you and cares about your feelings. So, work out a compromise or plan with him to help make him neater. For example, does he always leave his boxers on the bathroom floor? Then get a second hamper and put it in the bathroom so he has somewhere else to put it without having to go all the way back into the bedroom closet. Or maybe it’s setting up boundaries for his mess. Like, he can be as messy as he wants in the bedroom, but the living room and dining room have to be clutter free. Nothing’s perfect and it’ll be a compromise, but as long as your guy is trying, it’s a win. Don’t forget to thank him for every little bit of effort he puts into being tidier.
Accept what you can’t change
Look, even the best man in the world might not be the perfect roommate. You have to just deal with the fact that part of your house isn’t going to be exactly how you like it all the time. Accept what you can’t change… and get a cleaning person to do the rest. It’s pricey, but if it cuts out a daily fight, it’s worth it.
Photo credit: greggoconnell / CC BY
