Fall Cleaning


Over the summer, I accumulated a lot of junk: an unhealthy addiction to purchasing hardcover books, cheap pairs of shoes I never wore, and a lot of empty wine bottles that should probably be recycled.

Summer is rough, you guys.

Add all of that junk onto the junk I already own, and I’m not totally sure how I manage to fit my entire life in a 7x10ft room. Especially considering my closet only fits half of each hanger inside of it.

Why is Spring the only season that has a designated cleaning period? I’m bringing it back for a much-needed Fall Cleaning.

And you know what? I don’t think there’s any sense in limiting this cleanse to just clothing/other physical objects/trash. I’m purging my love life, too!

To explain, we must first go back in time to June.

Everyone is so unbelievably friendly in the Summer. I love it because I make friends in random locales, but my phone’s contact list has grown to include the likes of ‘Cam Oregon Child’, ‘Malt House Guy’, and my personal favorite – ‘Matt Old Guy Friend Steve’.

None of these boys serve a purpose. None of them posses any sort of quality that could be remotely attractive in a potential, well, anything. Only one of them actually followed through and took me on a date. I’ll randomly get texts from the others to see “wat r u up to?” at 2am. I haven’t seen you in 2 months, this has never worked before, why do you think this is going to be a game changer? Go home, dude.

And then there are the guys who have last names in my contact list, the ones I’ve gone out with a couple-few times, but there’s been no sign of progressing past wherever it lays now. I have no idea what’s going on and that’s a little bit frustrating, but not that frustrating. Because there isn’t a spark there anyway, so I wouldn’t even call it a loss.

In my experience, no one wants to get into a relationship over the summer – it’s our time to be young, wild, and free. I won’t argue against that. If anything, I’ll lobby for it.

But, Fall.  Fall is a different story.

Fall is for dating men with a fresh outlook on matters of the heart. Fall is for finding that perfect person to explore the city with, drink hot chocolate with, and – most importantly – watch Netflix on your couch and order in Thai food with.

So as my city turns yellow and red and orange and brown, I’m going to cleanse myself (and my contact list) of those Summer Romances, Summer Non-Romances, and everything in between. It’s time to make room in my closet for sweaters and space in my heart for love… at least until Spring.