Patti's Blog

What If My Boyfriend Can’t Get Hard?



Oh, girl. If you’ve clicked into this post, know that just about every woman on the face of the planet has dealt with this. Erectile problems aren’t just for old men or boring relationships or unattractive women. They happen to men of all ages even when they’re excited about their partner and believe me, even the sexiest women on the planet have reached down to feel something limp. My hottest friend, who’s gotten rave bedroom reviews from many men, has confided in me that she’s dealt with several penis problems in her day. If it happens to her, it happens to everyone. So, here’s how to handle a soft salami situation.

Don’t Take It Personally

Like I’ve been saying, this happens to every, single woman. It’s not you. It’s not even him. It’s his penis that’s the problem. Don’t sulk or feel unwanted or unsexy. Just understand that this is basically a flub of his body that has nothing to do with you. It’s like a loud tummy gurgle, in a way. No one wants it to happen, but it’s not really indicative of anything meaningful about you. You’re still just as desirable as you were two minutes ago, before he went soft. Absolutely nothing about you has changed.

Focus on What Feels Good

Instead of giving up on sex entirely just because his body isn’t up for it, figure out what would make you sexually satisfied that isn’t actually sex. His pecker might not be working, but the rest of his body is. Put it to use! Try not to let wang worries ruin all of your bedtime fun. It might take a little pep talk to get him back into the make out mood, though. Most men are embarrassed and even more frustrated than you are when this happens. But, a little cheering up should get him back on track and you can still be satisfied.

Gently Suggest Help

This is sticky and not an easy thing to bring up. But, if you two are encountering problems more times than not, it’s probably worth addressing. Erectile issues can stem from a variety of causes from general unhealthy habits to anxiety to serious illness to age. Unless you’re a doctor, you can’t really diagnose him. But, some gentle words about how his sex life could be enhanced by a little professional help might go a long way in enhancing your own sex life, which would be well worth the temporary awkwardness.

Good luck out there, ladies!