AskPatti

Signs you’re in a “for now” not “forever” relationship

Woman questions what kind of relationship she is inHow do you know if the guy you’re dating now is the one or just a future memory in the making? It’s often tricky because things like good sex and perfectly crinkly eyes when he smiles can make you feel like the relationship is more real than it actually is. Trust me, it happens to even the smartest women. A nice tush can do the same thing! So, here are quick questions you can ask yourself to find out if he’s perfect for you forever or just for now.

Can you fight with him?

I know it’s weird for my first sign of true love to be about fighting, but being able to fight with your significant other in a healthy way is one of the most important elements of a functional relationship. Do you guys fight about the issue at hand and not bring up unrelated things? Can you guys disagree without hurtful name-calling? Are you ever afraid of him (or is he afraid of you) when he (or you) gets angry? Be sure that you’re able to fight without fear or ugliness and you guys will definitely be on a path to happily ever after.

Can you plan into the future?

How far in the future are you able to plan with him? Does he make you feel clingy if you ask him to a wedding five months down the road? Are you two able to talk about your five-year plans? The right guy will be eager to talk about spending forever with you and very excited to bend and mold his future to intertwine with yours. Anything less than that and he’s not your forever guy.

Do your people like him?

How do your friends and family feel about your man? I know that they’re not the ones dating him, but their feelings for him still matter. If your loved ones love your lover, your life will be much easier down the road. And, trust me, an easy road can make all the difference. If your family or friend group doesn’t like your guy, it might be time to investigate why and if it’s worth spending much more of your time on someone your favorite people can’t stand.

Have you talked about the issues?

These conversations are not the most fun part of a relationship, but they are the most important. Have you talked with him about crucial topics like financial philosophies, religious beliefs and if you want kids? And more importantly, do you agree? These issues are the foundations of a relationship. You two have to have a strong, solid base to build a successful relationship on. So, be sure that you have it.

Do you laugh with him?

This seems obvious, but do you have fun with him? All of the above points are crucial, of course. But, there’s got to be that x-factor of chemistry and fun. If it’s not there, why spend any more time with him? There are a million guys who look good on paper. Look for a guy who makes you feel good too.

Who out there thinks they’re with their forever guy and who is just having fun with a for now fellow?

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3 Responses to Signs you’re in a “for now” not “forever” relationship

  1. Katie says:

    I’ve been dating my man for 5 months, and as far as I know, he’s everything I could want in a guy. He meets all the signs of being a “forever” guy according to the article except planning in the future. We are in a long distance relationship and he doesn’t exactly like to plan when we will see each other as much as I like to (my personality makes me a big planner.) He calls it “going with the flow”, but sometimes I wonder if he’s afraid of commitment. I know he was burned pretty bad in the past by a serious girlfriend (now, ex), so he’s “jaded”, but at the same time, isn’t it time to get over that? 5 months isn’t that long of a time, but should I already know if this is the one for me?

  2. Gracy Dumez says:

    Thanks to Dr oshoum, i am very grateful to him for bringing my Man back after two years of broken marriage because of pregnancy problem. I really do love my man and he is my source of finance. we love to have kids and his dad want to see him bear kids before he can will his property to him but i could not bear him a child dew to my age then he decide to live me for another another lady. Now we are back together and i have a baby boy for him. for any marriage problem contact oshogumspelltemple@live.com

  3. Gracy Dumez says:

    Thanks to Dr oshoum, i am very grateful to him for bringing my Man back after two years of broken marriage because of pregnancy problem. I really do love my man and he is my source of finance. we love to have kids and his dad want to see him bear kids before he can will his property to him but i could not bear him a child dew to my age then he decide to live me for another another lady. Now we are back together and i have a baby boy for him. for any marriage problem contact oshogumspelltemple@live.com. very safe

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