Relationships

Do you have an abusive ex?

Walking away from old relationships entirely is a lot more difficult that just moving your feet in the right direction. Whenever you start to consider getting back together with an ex boyfriend who comes knocking at your door, one that you have a long and possibly damaged history with, there are some key notes to consider. (Remember that abuse can be mental and emotional, too)

Follow your head

This is important for getting back together with any ex — a cheater, an abuser or even just a guy you grew out of – because your heart isn’t always right. Sometimes you have to let brainpower take the wheel. Your head is going to help you make the smartest decision for you, for your family, and for the relationship at hand. If your heart is beating so loudly that you’re having a hard time hearing your head, ask yourself this: If your best friend were in your position, what would you tell her to do? That answer will likely come from your head.

Family, family, family

When easing into life as a couple again, focus on spending time with each other’s families. Parents and siblings are often our lifelines and they may just be the best people to guide you when you’re having trouble making sense of the situation.

Question change

Question change and know what a second chance means. You ended it the first time around for a reason. Maybe someone cheated. Maybe there was abuse whether it was verbal, mental or physical, or maybe you two just grew apart. Remember why it didn’t work out the first time, consider what has or hasn’t changed since and don’t water down your message.

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